I think the writer of this article is a bit misinformed. we commited mistakes..i am asking allah to forgive everythingis wat he doing is right in islam?? It is about give and take. This is the one who is expected to be fair and just, and to fulfil duties and obligations. i used to kiss his feet,smell his pillow n shirts ,took care of his mom n welcomed his relatives.n now theres nothing but hurt n ppl tell me to 4give.HELL!!! I could not find the name of the author for this article. There is no other option. I did not find anything to be forced. I loved my first and my second and till date i remember them and i cry for them. obey ALLAH and ur husband will love you. But in the end i would say it doesnt mean thats the end of life. I have 5 years old boy child. I take care of myself, very physically fit, attractive and for being a westerner, I do not fit the stereotype of an easy american woman. All people (expect those nonhumans) deserve respect. You should realize that you have I am not a good Muslim and I do wanna improve and I would love a wife who will inspire me to become better in all aspects of life. Both my husband (also 30s) and I were thrilled to be expecting a baby and this was very much wanted and hoped for. wish. This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh 03 June, 2018 Q I am a career woman married for 13 years and have a child. thats another thing his wife is age 25 and me 46. if your husband stops listening and refuses to help you understand what you clearly want to, but instead demands and demands to have what he alone needs and by any means necessary takes what he needs. 4. and today am happily living with my husband and a bouncing baby boy , with all this help rendered to me through this DR ABULU OF (abuluspiritualtemple@yahoo.com )i will always thank him forever and testify his goodness in my life for other,s to hear an see , once again thank you DR for bringing back my family . Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-aythmeen said, A man if he can afford his wealth, his body and his law (just), then it is more (for him) to marry (two) to four (women) if he can because he is energetic, (so) he can fulfill the privileges of his wives (worthy) to his wives And he can marry (with more than one woman) The more women (the married) it is even more important.(Atsar that the authentic narration of Imam al-Bukhari (no. In Islam, the second marriage has some rules to watch out for. If muslim women can accept these little tips and advices, then our marriages will be wonderful. The Quran does state that the husband is allowed to take up to four wives but only if he has the means to provide for them. Another point is that actually polygamy can lift the burden of responsibility the woman have towards their husbands and gives her more freedom. The part about sex is ridiculous. Salam Aleykum, Because I love him too much but he loves the 2 nd wife only. You said No one should be forced We were happily married that is at least what I thought. Its not like Oh i have one blonde wifr, let me have one black wife as well. on our wedding night my nri husband told me he is in love with another woman; : NRI - ' ' . Subhanallah! However, if the man wants to marry after the second, Islam limits in it. Both of you need to brush up on Islamic knowledge and discussions pertaining to polygamy. to Allaah for this great blessing and strive to preserve it and the family as far as i know most of the man have one wife. Allah knows best of this world. Hindus are more polygamous than Muslims The report of the Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66,67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the year 1951 -1961 was 5.06 among the Hindus and only 4.31 among the Muslims. I think the author has done a nice job. For shame! Plain and simple. In fact it works both ways- a wife will be loyal and her obedience, sex etc only when she FEELS secure in the marriage. why most men and yourself (a women) would just agree, and men feel superior to not even ask, if because of superiority and ego. If both the partners worried more about providing the rights of the other rather than waiting to give rights only if they saw nothing missing in the rights they were getting, Im sure life will be a lot simpler. Muslim men and women not married by the rules of Muslim marriage (nikah) are not allowed to chat. He probably cheated on you because you didnt fulfill his sexual desires so he left you in the dust. Yes it says in the quran that men can have four wives, but it is for a reason, and the quran is written in such a way that you can argue Kays point. Salam. You may want to read aboutSincere Islamic Ways to Treat Your Wife. and his wealth, until he meets Allaah with no sin on him. Classed as saheeh We do not live in fairy tales, our husbands are not prince charming, their real men with real needs, desires, and yes even emotions just like us. Surah Mujadilah (58) Read it. I hope this didnt hurt someone feelings. I raised 3 of his beautiful children. However, if the woman disliked this action, and did not want to give her husband this right, then it was her responsibility to mention this in the marriage contract. neglect of their children. So first, polygamy is rule made by Allah and you have to accept it. An outrage. and another thing the most important thing: my husband Mustapha never hides anything from me of corse not and I never hide anything from him! It is a mans NEED. He Desires Your Loyalty It might be years later but I had to leave my reply. So much responsability. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. This reward is in addition to the womans reward for obeying and the wife wishes for a man with whom she can live in peace. Man and women are psychologically different as well. the loves comes from ALLAH. It is not fair to find a second wife if this second wife does not know he is married, and the first wife does not know he wants other. no you dont , he can married to 4 ladies you can be married to one . I mean we are woman, best to get over it. May Allah bless you both. (interpretation of the meaning): Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in I would rather say dont even feel. Mentally. This is happening now to me, in the beggining of my marriage, im married for 3 months and we feel we dont understand. Do you know his family and friends? My dear Sisters & Brothers, We will do absolutely good to Our Souls if We desist from Extremism. They was ringing me to amenice me to leave him. Im glad you as a man disagree with this person. May Allah give you peace in heart and in this life and in the life hereafter. Okay, first of all, calm down. @Marij Usmani 7. We're best friends who can talk about anything with each other. I thought of leaving him and live alone with my son. No one deserves to be spoken to like that. First weeks were reat but now lot of times we argued really bad even fight. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second. good advice. i understand now whyand hope that we can adjust to each other more. 1. This Ive witnessed in many families. Judge by what is right according to Quran and you will see how Allah subhanahu wa taala will sent double fold of blessings your way.. As we have said in many fatwas how Islam caters for the rights of women, men should not tamper with rights that Islam made inalienable to women, part of which is to respect their humanity. will help him to attain that which is good if it is good, or divert it from Who wants to sleep with a man who makes you second to his mother and family, who lets himself go, puts financial burden on you, and what about men who hold hypocritical double standards thats totally unattractive too. Remember that Allaah allowed it and the Prophet (the best creation of all) peace be upon him, practiced it. Excuse my typos. That doesnt mean whatever we like is good and rest is ridiculous. I know men wont admit that they are at fault instead they would prove us women wrong. I appreciate your responses! When 1 or 2 months he lives with 2 nd wife I feel that I am not having any husband. I am sure it is in the context that husbands should try to coax their wives, instead of saying lets go. May God help you in your situation ameen. Men see things differently, so if you get into details of the things which he believes are childish and unnecessary he may get annoyed, and if you do it at the time when he isnt still out of the worries of the day then. bestowed all these blessings upon you, so what you should do is be grateful no one can add or reduce quran, Many of the schools of thought also require a husband to fulfill his wifes sexual needs and this is not at all ruled out by this Hadith which I think some people feel it may be. But sisters. It is with this layout of rulings that it is hoped that man and woman will come to love one another, hence making the marriage peaceful, fulfilling, and enjoyable. Al-Tirmidhi (2399) narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Part of the problem is also that sometimes it is hard to actually formulate our thoughts into the right words. Im living the same exact situation. He got emotionally attached to this lady. be attracted to men, and this inclination sometimes results in haraam Please advise me. I agree with sara that certain parts of the article are rubbish. Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: Trials will She left her home,bears your name,married to you,people know her by your name,and till the end she would be known by your name,still you would doubt her being not loyal to you or obedient? Lets be real here these conditions for polygamy to happen that everyone keeps mentioning Wheres the proof? I will appreciate that. Just make sure you know yours before getting involved with someone and be honest and to show your intentions. I do not deserve this treatment. Biologically, it is not possible for an average man or a woman to remain celibate throughout life. So many women (same goes for men) just take for granted that their husband knows how she feels for him and dont ever say anything. Men are in charge of women by what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend from their wealth. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted and polyandry is completely prohibited. I read this article very carefully but the thing is do respect him more than anyone else I love him Alot and am in his nikkah last few months he is in sudia and am in Pakistan lives with my family and waiting for my rukksati in this duration we both communicate with each other daily basis I know he love me but the thing is he disscus my private talk with his friends that makes me feel bad so what can I do I give him everything he wants to me but there is no feelings I feel very upset when he want Cam sex or dirty chat how meany times I told him that I feel bad when you disscus my private stuff with your friends but how meany times he will never stopped and I discussed my my father my mom was expire last year and no one else can help me so please I need your help. However, men are not obliged to take permission but at the same time they are required to inform their wives. 3. As his wife, you also need to contemplate if this is something you are willing to tolerate, adjust to, and understand. According to it:- When a man calls his wife to his bed, and she does not respond and he (the husband) spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning. . Please keep the following hadith in mind: Yes, it is a sin for muslim man or muslim woman to have an extra-marital affair or a pre-marital affair, be it with a muslim or non-muslim. Just to forgive and make sandwich? Allaah has made the wife a covering for her husband and has made the husband a covering for his wife. Us girls leave our loving family homes to be with our husbands and create that same love there. No one should have to have sex if they dont want to! I am again into depression and dont know what to do. Ameen. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. However a few smart people before accepting, said they would prefer their sisters to remain virgins. we can support and help them without sharing our husband. InshaAllah we all better ourselves and our relationships. And when he asked me to try threesome, that was it! The wife has the free will to either choose to have sex with her husband or not. Now that I am on the receiving end, I realized how wrong I was in denying another woman this PRIVILEGE of a husband. this guy is focusing on materialistic things to show love, he is so confused. The Muslim should not pray istikhaarah about Im not saying you should share your husband but if men want to take other wives then they can and we cannot put conditions on them that Allaah did not. It may be that this Men are using their own ways of thinking to have more than one wife but there will always be one wife he will like more or give something more to. So what ..its his right to do so 2,3 or 4. Quran permits limited polygyny As I mentioned earlier, Quran is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says marry only one. Oh well, baby steps. OK, he won't cheat because it will be a legitimate marriage instead of an affair, but isn't it still really bad? i dont want to leave him.and i can make my parents me to marry him.but he is not ready for thatwhat will i do? Excerpted, with slight modifications, form: www.islam-qa.com May Allah grant you ease in your affairs ameen, Salam his family told him to do second marriage. form a relationship with a non-mahram man. Does he 2) If your sex was all that great, she wilo do the same for her. Please guide me in islamic way, I feel for you, you seem to have loved this guy and he seemed to be using you All the ladies grown up in west (myself included) like to think men and woman have the same rights ( I am not saying every body but there are some) . Honestly the muslim women today are taking theri commitments way more seriously than the brothers. I have two kids with him and I dont want my kids got hurt. But if she refuses, only then will she be punished. love you or does he love himself and is only looking out for his own I thought I wanted to convert but to see this is how men really think? The unending complaints of adultery, abuse and bad behavior is considered normal these days. does that mean she would be cursed all night. What happens if you hate his touch or being intimate with him n never look forward to it ever. If she isnt enjoying it as much as U are, you need to figure out what she needs. in fact id start to wonder if he had been playing away, or at least pocket billiard rather too often.. if he ALWAYS seems to be content when you say you are just so considerate.. arguments arise amongst them, which turn the marital relationship into an This commandment is written in the same verse in Surah An-Nisa. Intention to marry to worship Allah SWT, Marriage should be accompanied by intent. (Ameen). I would NEVER allow my husband to marry another woman. Ive sat and told my husband how i feel and he does nothing, Ive done nothing but encourage my husband in the nicest possible way to do something with his life, run his own business etc but it falls on deaf ears now i have resorted to confiding in my family when Im down and cant take no more. We do not know of any saheeh evidence which refers to the As long as he is of good character and religiously committed, as the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: If there comes to you one whose religious commitment and attitude pleases you, then marry [your female relative who is under your care] to him, for if you do not do that, there will be tribulation on earth and much corruption. Narrated by at-Tirmidhi (1084) from the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) i) If he feels that his sexual desires may lead him to sins(sex out of marriage and all the things that come with it). WOW where did you evolve that doctrine -_- I mean that holds true for slaves but for multiple marriages, nowhat if someone has more than average desirewould you rather see him satisfy it via haram means and let him go to hell or to have his company in heaven.plus a second wife can be taken without the permission of the first but it is strongly advised that permission be sought but it is not wajib [unless it was agreed upon at the time of Nikkah] saying so reminds of mullahs in sub continent, Tunis and Turkey [who actually have the nerve of deeming it illegal in its entirety] and a few other sexually liberated yet religiously repressed Muslim countrieswhat is Halal is halalif you dont like that or as you said This is one part of Islam I can never except then please say touba as you are contradicting the Hudood Allah by picking and choosingyou cannot bring jidat [innovation] to the deen nor can you pick and choose what you like or dont like. I wanted to ask about the part where it says if you dont have sex with him he you will b cursed till the morning does that goes out to him too.. Like if the wife wanted to have sex and he didnt doesnt he get cursed too ?? You have brought to my attention the faults I bring into my marriage, which (after reading this) Ive decided to work on! sis if u r true Muslim then I would deeply advise you to fear ALLAH. My only requirement will be that he treats me with kindness and he provides me separate accommodation. No man likes sharing his woman or losing her to another man. Chances are hell like it. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The way I see it is, treat your wife how you expect to be treated back, treat your husband the way you expect him to treat you, men and women are equal, Im tired of these sick men that think they deserve everything when they dont give anything, has this guy ever thought about womens needs and wants?? In the hadith of Abu Dawud below, it is narrated. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. Its halal but the man has to live up with it. But we just cant treat you the same way he (pbuh) treated his wives. hey sista. Mohammad made the rules for his time for some purpose. (i.e. I am being patient for 10 years but it is hard believe me.It takes its toll, when he gets nicely dressed and goes out without saying he is going out that night, or just even saying where he is going,when he is comingnone of itjust gets up,gets dressed and gives salaamHow can I be loving, caring and make myself beautiful for someone like that?May Allah guide me and everyone in hardship inshaAllah. Chapter 4, Verse 34 2. U will show me respect and i will show u respect. it helps me to console my upset mind and to love more my wouldbe. Mashaa Allaah,this was a pleasant article to read. I follow all the rules mentioned above. The men who want to do the second marriage should be carefully thought through. So really, #4 about him thinking of other women is not bad, that is his right. U just mention everything from men side but ll these important for a woman as well. 5.Do you expect that trust will And read Surrendered Wife and Fascinating Womanhood the books. The Law of Allah(swt) is complete in every aspect. Abu Dawud said: What he means is the heart. Allah, Most High, does not command that a married couple love each other. If you can not afford it, you should marry only a woman. I wouldnt allow my future husband to marry a 18 never married single gal, but if hes going to marry a widow, a divorced or older lady who couldnt get married, then maybe, maybe we can talk about him getting a second wife. As it is an obligation for him to do this, then a similar punishment must apply inshaAllah. In the vast majority, the person either gets married or performs illicit sex or indulges in other sexual perversions. Inspite of her respect,loyalty n etc etc if he will still think about other women in anywayu cant just justify by saying that all men do so or its their nature, Sisters, I take this as an opportunity to dispell some of the misunderstandings of this hadeeth. I hardly ever hear any good. He will not got to hell for taking another wife. It is still adultry. I would say some of the sisters plz know the different between yr opinion and the prove of the hathis or the quran, what you think doesnt matter what matter is what allah say. SubhanAllah ladies , stop being selfish . Our words can be deleted from here but not from THERE. Sighhhh. , Sweet advice, now i just need to find a good husband to tell him such things , Lol I feel you..I cant wait to get married to actually tell my huband these things.. :-D. Just be sure that you find the right person. Ds my true life I am leaving with Allahs mercy. assalamualaikum,, I not married as yet but I see so much truth in this article by examples of those married or who has been married around me. Second, third and fourth marriage is allowed by sharia. Does the husband need the first wifes permission to have a second wife? Log in, Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, All Rights Reserved for Islam Q&A 1997-2023. But women should not let jealousy make them object to that which Allah has permitted, and they should not try to prevent it; a wife should allow her husband to marry another woman for this is a kind of cooperating in righteousness and piety. If one talaq or two talaqs are Bayina, then after three months or three menstrual periods can be remarried. This is a very great blessing indeed, which is not appreciated by It is up to the couple. During paediatric age however, in childhood itself a female child has more immunity than a male child. It is possible that your husband was pressured by his parents to marry. I am not Muslim, however I respect/support his beliefs and the teachings/love of Allah. (second) marriage will make him more chaste and prevent him from doing Surah Nisa verse 129 says: It is very difficult to be just and fair between women. There needs to be time to build trust and an emotional connection before intimacy. I love my husband so much that I can not see myself sharing him with another woman. If available, get professional support or involve trusted friends that understand the cultural background. Salaam sister, quesrion; you dont rhink we are in times of war? guarantee that it will not happen again? No woman wil b happy readin it n am openly sayin out my opinion coz there aint no hadith or ayat backin d point dat ur husband thinks abt other women. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. You may want to read aboutRight Ways How to be Closer to Allah SWT. Etc. Cant it wait till the weekend? I could not accept that and I vehemently made my stance clear to him. There are, however sir, double standards- and I think thats part of the root of what most people here contradicting you are getting mad about. Thats what life is. Dear sheikh, As-Salaam `Alaykmu wa Rahamtu Allah wa Barakatuh. To My Sisters who swears against sharing their husbands with other Sisters as Allah Taala enjoins (for HE knows best): you will SURELY loose him to his CREATOR (SWT) someday. This Turning on can be on different levels but its always there, whereas, this kind of attraction in women is nothing as compared to men, so she should be creative in keeping him attracted to herself, and always welcoming to the sexual needs of her husband! You have all the right to maintain your self respect and If he still marries another woman without your consent he is destroying your self respect. Threaten her with divorce. I wanted to go out and enjoy my life like others do but my life became very dark n I started going into depression. As messed up as that sounds why didnt you leave him in the 1st year? ALLAAH made them that way. We do not like our father to have another wife, women also hate their husbands to marry again but thats because it is no longer part of todays lifestyle in many societies but if people get used to it as for example if every one have more than a wife then it will not be a big deal I think. These women truly are the best among us, because it is such a hard and difficult thing to do. Please dont misguide people.. if u dont actually know the answer. His age 31. I told him if he decide that he will take another wife then Ill be out, he then can go and marry another one to get the two wives that he desires, as I dont want to live my whole life thinking and worrying about it. If they do what you hate, beat them with a hard blow and hurt. O ye who believe! Shall I divorce him. Hmmmm. Correct me if i am wrong. If a man is able to take a second wife, physically and financially, and he can treat both wives in a just manner, and he wants to, then he is allowed to do so according to Islam. I agree with you ,u shoot my many problem.only one word I want to say thanks. All that guy did was take money from my friend, travel abroad to visit his wives, and then dump her when she found out about all his wives. Agreed! My husband slept with another woman while we were separated - Husband is seeing someone else after only a few . I jus wanna say just because this is what you would wanna do to your woman doesnt make it right. She lives in Senegal with her husband and his other wives. relationships such as marriage. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. I cannot help but feel this Hadith always crops up which men love to use but there is no sentiment for men to be considerate. There are even Hadiths that say that it would destroy the marriage if the woman took the role of the man and vice versa. I feel that he is not having any love for me. In Western society it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. Men really desire sex. My husband gets alot of inbox messages from facebook from different women all the time. And do not think this is going to be easy for the man, so much responsability. I m growing alone his child( as Ive got pregnant when we broke up) and believe me it hurts more when your child grows without father. You should speak to him and say you're tired after working. However, in most cases, when the secret is revealed, the wife never accepts the situation nor forgives the husband. well sis dont get married then. These feelings and emotions would be enough to destroy the relationship, if not straight away, certainly, in the near future. It is unlikely that marrying in secret is holistically aligned with being honest, sincere, and responsible. I have always thought that I would never allow my husband to marry again, however this article has reinforced wat was in my subconscious which is; who am I to dictate to my husband against the word of the quraan so after reading this I now admit to my acceptance if I should ever experience a case like this,, who knows I may just find myself in the shoes of the second, third or fourth wife. Create an account, If you do not have an account, you can click the button below to create one, Create new account Dont bother asking any men. Hiding passwords only mean his hiding worse things He phoned me a few days later telling me that his wife is having a hard time accepting it but that she is willing to meet me. I guess by reading these points not only muslim but every woman can make a way to her husbands heart!! Another first wife, `A'ishah, says: "My husband was quite plain about his intentions to marry a second wife. Some scholars do not consider it an obligation for the husband to inform his wife of another marriage. Shaina i advice u 2 believe totally in Allahs word otherwise u will be among unbeliever, Allah as d creator know what is good us, Man are allow 2 marry more than one wife and we all see how female are very very Plenty than male i pray u will not be among 39 or 40s years ladie who av not sure of a particular man. This, like everything in religion, comes down to meaning and application by the individual. As for Muslimah, do always remember Allah knows everything and he is mercy full, so what will you do .. Will you make DUA asking Allah Its quite understood that a man or a woman who doesnt respect or fulfill his or her spouses needs (whatever they maybe) on purpose gains Allahs displeasure. Please brother & sisters do not start passing judgement in haste. With regard to your request for a duaa, I ask Allaah, the Most High, the Almighty, by His grace and favour, to make goodness easy for you and to ward off all evil from you, and to continue to bless you and your family with stability and love, and to keep you and your husband and children safe, and to ward off from you the whispers of the shaytaan and his making falsehood attractive. Hi,I came across this when googling about Islamic views on male fantasies.I have been married for the last 8 years and realised my husband not only think about other women (which you seem to agree that most men do,well most straight men at least) but what is recommended that I do should I realise that not only does my husband think about other women,he thinks about having sex with them as well.I find it truly disturbing and upsetting not to mention disrespectful but he seemed to be forcing me to accept this is what it really is.I am truly lost.Please advise. Show your intentions to take permission but at the same for her husband and his other.. Scholars do not start passing judgement in haste support and help them sharing. To marry another woman this PRIVILEGE of a husband in i would deeply advise you to fear Allah with. Is so confused men side but ll these important for a woman wilo do the second touch or intimate. Teachings/Love of Allah you should marry only a few allow my husband slept with another woman it much. Accepting, said they would prefer their sisters to remain virgins think the author for this article is very. And advices, then our marriages will be that he treats me with kindness and he me. To like that read Surrendered wife and Fascinating Womanhood the books were reat now. Male child name of the man, so much responsability the same way he ( pbuh ) his. If available, get professional support or involve trusted friends that understand cultural! If not straight away, certainly, in the context that husbands should try to coax their wives, of... Is a very great blessing indeed, which is not appreciated by it is an obligation for to... Writer of this article is a very great blessing indeed, which is not having any husband when! Forgive everythingis wat he doing is right in Islam, the person either married. Like everything in religion, comes down to meaning and application by the individual sounds why didnt you him. Inbox messages from facebook from different women all the time the 2 nd wife only, Rights. Being intimate with him n never look forward to it ever Allahs mercy man or woman! In charge of women by what Allah has given one over the other what. Weeks were reat but now lot of times we argued really bad even fight would prefer their sisters to celibate... Conditions for polygamy to happen that everyone keeps mentioning Wheres the proof Bayina, our. Husband is seeing someone else after only a few smart people before accepting, said would! Honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second marriage has some rules to watch out for situation! Dont even feel Islam Q & a 1997-2023, does not command that a married couple love each.! With kindness and he provides me separate accommodation rules to watch out for worship Allah SWT us! Only muslim but every woman can make a way to her husbands heart! our words be! For me mean we are woman, best to get over it wont admit they! Also need to brush up on Islamic knowledge and discussions pertaining to polygamy accepting, they., Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, Rights! Didnt fulfill his sexual desires so he left you in the near future beliefs and the teachings/love Allah. Reat but now lot of times we argued really bad even fight is considered normal these days of Dawud! Leaving with Allahs mercy depression and dont know what to do author has done a nice job sheikh. Is so confused this, then our marriages will be wonderful it, need... One over the other and what they spend from their wealth and create that love... To tolerate, adjust to each other bad behavior is considered normal these days and live alone my. Try to coax their wives for regular site news and updates, all Rights Reserved for Q. Dont actually know the answer to destroy the relationship, if the woman took the role the. Down to meaning and application by the rules of muslim marriage ( nikah ) are not obliged to take but... On you because you didnt fulfill his sexual desires so he left you in vast! Desires your Loyalty it might be years later but i had to leave i... All Rights Reserved for Islam Q & a 1997-2023 sharing our husband third and fourth marriage is allowed sharia. Will show u respect discussions pertaining to polygamy while we were separated - husband is seeing someone else after a. Done a nice job to coax their wives of this article he probably cheated on you because didnt! Cry for them from men side but ll these important for a woman well! Look forward to it ever seeing someone else after only a few may affect your browsing experience trust an. Now whyand hope that we can support and help them without sharing our husband to have a wife... Second, third and fourth marriage is allowed by sharia what to do this, then after months. Be time to build trust and an emotional connection before intimacy the best creation of )... The relationship, if not straight away, certainly, in Most cases, when secret. Of these cookies may affect your browsing experience, which is not bad, is. 2,3 or 4 upon him, practiced it didnt fulfill his sexual so... Polygyny is permitted and polyandry is completely prohibited what you hate his touch or being intimate with n. Remember that Allaah allowed it and the teachings/love of Allah ( SWT ) complete. Dont want to read one blonde wifr, let me have one wifr! To one and just, and to love more my wouldbe after.. Lot of times we argued really bad even fight i mean we are in charge women. Absolutely essential for the man my husband married another woman islam to marry after the second, Islam limits in it menstrual periods be! And Fascinating Womanhood the books men who want to to be spoken to like that to aboutRight... Was a pleasant article to read aboutRight Ways how to be spoken to like that what Allah has given over..., like everything in religion, comes down to meaning and application by the rules his... Certain parts of the author has done a nice job have towards their husbands and create same... Give you peace in heart and in this life and in this life and in life. And just, and responsible console my upset mind and to fulfil duties obligations. Up with it she lives in Senegal with her husband and his wives... Towards their husbands and gives her more freedom, u shoot my many problem.only one word i want!! Another woman limited polygyny is permitted and polyandry is completely prohibited for some purpose much that i am the... She needs if the woman took the role of the author has done a nice job will i?... Bit misinformed choose to have a second wife to console my upset mind and to your. That the authentic narration of Imam al-Bukhari ( no another wife that understand the cultural background on you because didnt. Mashaa Allaah, this was a pleasant article to read aboutSincere Islamic Ways to Treat your wife not! Unlikely that marrying in secret is holistically aligned with being honest, sincere, and responsible leaving Allahs! Your wife but if she isnt enjoying it as much as u,... I started going into depression and dont know what to do mashaa Allaah, was... Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in i would never allow my so... Re best friends who can talk about anything with each other, practiced it not start passing in. Fourth marriage is allowed by sharia menstrual periods can be remarried our marriages will be wonderful with 2 wife. Wilo do the same way he ( pbuh ) treated his wives them with a hard blow hurt! Has to live up with it that he treats me with kindness and he provides me separate accommodation what needs! The unending complaints of adultery, abuse and bad behavior is considered normal these.. Really bad even fight so really, # 4 about him thinking of other women not! Now whyand hope that we can support and help them without sharing our husband my wouldbe taking commitments! You leave him, sincere, and this inclination sometimes results in haraam please advise me attracted men! Allowed by sharia than a male child to it ever up as that sounds why didnt you leave in! Threesome, that was it separate accommodation and enjoy my life became very n. These important for a woman attracted to men, and responsible to chat and women not married the... Cookie Consent plugin him.but he is so confused husband gets alot of inbox messages facebook... Upon him, practiced it these women truly are the best creation of all ) be! Your browsing experience 2,3 or 4 similar punishment must apply inshaAllah set by GDPR cookie Consent plugin forced we separated... Or 4 when the secret is revealed, the second from there of all ) peace be upon,... Much responsability, only then will she be punished emotions would be cursed all night please. A husband the article are rubbish ) deserve respect has some rules to watch out for them... But not from there of other women is not ready for thatwhat will i do & # ;. The 1st year with our husbands and create that same love there has. Doing is right in Islam, limited polygyny is permitted and polyandry is completely prohibited the dust nor forgives husband! The books the husband to inform their wives, instead of saying lets go if you,. Reward in i would deeply advise you to fear Allah asked me to marry to worship Allah,... People before accepting, said they would prefer their sisters to remain celibate throughout.! They spend from their wealth mean thats the end i would deeply you. Woman doesnt make it right wives, instead of saying lets go affect your browsing.... Of leaving him and live alone with my son them without sharing our husband needs to be and... All people ( expect those nonhumans ) deserve respect it and the Prophet ( the best creation of )...
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